Do You Lie to Your Kids?
Posted in Parenting on 29. Sep, 2009

When my daughter asked her what would happen to her if she bit her sister, I was taken aback. She hasn’t really expressed much aggression towards her sister, and she’s certainly not a biter (and never has been). Not wanting to leave any wiggle room for an experiment on her part, I was firm. I confess that I didn’t think this through, but my response was, “Well, if you bite your sister, then no candy until you are ten years old.”
She’s four.
So, I lied to my daughter. I’m not really going to ban her from having M&M’s for the next six years. So why did I say that? For starters, it caught me off guard and I blurted out my response too quickly. But mainly, I wanted to impress upon her the seriousness of biting, and more or less shock her with what a stern punishment she would receive if she decided to chomp on her baby sister. I thought this over afterwards, and realized that there was no reason to lie to my daughter about the punishment she would receive. I doubt she’ll even remember this talk or bring it up later, but I still need to set a good example and tell the truth to my daughter instead of making up draconian punishments just to startle her.
Apparently, I’m not alone. An article posted today on msnbc.com discusses parents lying to their children, and why they do it. Personally, I did it for dramatic emphasis. Of course there are plenty of other reasons to fib to your kid. I can think of plenty, but for now I’ll suggest two words: Santa Claus.
Read this and decide for yourself if and when it’s ok to bend the truth with your children.
Parents lie to kids more often than they realize [msnbc.com]
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Ah… the lies that sometimes slip out of our mouths. Just this morning I was giving my three kids a bath. As I turned around to grab towels, my two boys threw two cups of water on the bathroom floor and then flopped down into the tub like whales at Sea World. Needless to say, there was water EVERYWHERE… including the hallway!!! Before formulating a thought, I blurted out, “YOU WILL NEVER GET TO TAKE A BATH AGAIN!” What???? I was even dumbfounded with myself.